Friday, June 26, 2009

Isabella...please

This post comes to you from a place of pure innocence. The snatcher wrote a song, and I listened. It was a pretty song, but there was a filthy underbelly. Here's the earliest version

Before researching the subject, I knew basically nothing. You may think of me as the Dark Lord of Evil...but this is Francis' song after all...and I never really got into that weird soft porn swingers shit or whatever that lesbian real sex show was.

I thought about it for 10 seconds, and then google searched the following:
Isabella HBO.

The above search yielded confusing results -- damn you google search preferences reverting to safe search after I clear my history!

But after doing an Isabella HBO Cat House search on youtube -- I was amazed to find lots of videos of some dude named Hof.

Hof's seems to be either a porn-star wrangler and/or he owns the Bunny Ranch, and Hof had this to say about why he looked unfavorably on the fine lady named Isabella:
She did skank porn. And uh...I didn't like it. And she got a drug habit... ...So finally she got out of that business...and she's making more money now making orgnanic vegetables in Massachusettes.
So sad. By that, I mean that Hof is super sad about all this because the lady could've made some serious millions doing proper porn (or hooking). Bald Dude in a Short Sleeve Vinyl Purple Shirt wants us to know that this is the tale of what could have been. We had a burgeoning porn star on our hands, and, sadly, she turned to drugs when she seemingly had every thing going in her favor?

What's the worst part about ending the fairy tale of making millions whilst ucking mother-uckers? The organic vegetables, obvo. This probably means a job at Whole Foods, but I'd rather imagine Isabella on her own quaint little farm tucked into a mountainside along a local highway leading North from Woo-stah -- where she sells apple cider and farm-fresh carrots to bright-eyed youths dressed in what could only be some sort of a sexy red-plaid and denim ensemble.

1 comment:

  1. Hey, so do you guys want to play a show in NYC sometime? - Patrick from www.myspace.com/flamingfire You don't have to play it with us, you won't hurt my feelings, but I'd sure love to help set it up and finally see you guys play.

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